A Techie's Blueprints

dreams...

2011-07-03T09:42:00.000-07:00

thodi si bhi jameenin na mili

aasamn to apana hain

jeb apani fati hain to kya

aankhon main apane sapana hain

2010-09-02T23:52:00.000-07:00

Poem after a long time:
********************************

The game I was in

Is not mine any more

Every one moves on

I remain at same score

Watching from the fence

I wait for my chance

Beats echoing all around

I restrain from the dance

Chaos all around

Yet I remain in lull

Colors which were bright

Seems hollow and dull

Time O... Time

Why don't you belt fast?

When will this era end?

How can this zealot remain aghast?

This sluggish movement

Is driving me crazy

A smile I flaunt

Though the heart remains hazy...

A journey called .. life

2010-06-16T21:42:00.000-07:00

Life : A time span where we hold our head high and live without any comprise to our values... or through incidents we learn to do so .....

Can you tell that how many types of people are there in this world?????.....ya ..if it had been "Bunty and Bubbly"..the answer would have been "two"...but its not a show on silver screen ...its goddamn life!!!!.....beyond our glazed dreams..there is a world in which people really "LIVE".....struggle to live...and you know ...when you come across these type of people ....you really feel pity,a sense of guilt....but as you go beyond that ....all your senses, all your feelings ..vanishes in a second..and that's the human nature....

let me share one of my straight encounter with the shit called as life......it was when i was coming to bck to ma coll ...it was the journey from Ahemdabad to Raurkela....as I boarded in the train....due to some railway exam or for the other reasons ..there was an enormous rush...double of the ppl than who were sitting,were standing....i went straight to ma seat and slept ...after some time i felt some one sitting near ma legs....I don't know why ..but it was more uncomfortable mentally than physically...contrary to ma nature i yelled at him...."kya bhaiya oopar baithoge kya"...he said politely..."are bhaiya jagah nahin hain..aur kuch problem hain"...but I said churlishly.."to maine kya theka le rakha hain..."...and he stood up and went away....

When I woke up ....and what I saw ..left me cursing my self....the man whom I drove away ..was sitting uncomfortably near the washbasin......he was having artificial leg instead of the natural one........I was really ashamed of myself....i thought..even if he hadn't had that artificial leg...i shouldn't have behaved with him like that...for once i thought that i should call him and should give him some space to sit....but I don't know what restrained me and I didn't...after sometime it was his station and he disappeared....and for sometime i was just rapt in thoughts "why didn't i call him up??? it struck me but i didn't implement it" and it was pinching me inside...i finished thinking with resolution that "from now onwards I'll implement the things as soon as it strikes me.."..

And earnestly speaking ..in our life...we need impregnable determination of our character to make decisions and ya to implement it too..whether it is related to your career or it is an emotional one....beacause...time is something which never waver waits for anyone...

But the same natural thing happened to me once again ...and i forgot the incident in seconds....and my resolution as well.....it was when i read something like this somewhere ..and all of sudden the whole thing just ...stood in front of me once again...i decided to write this blog to remind me that ...at that day whatever said to myself was not gibberish/ rambling ...it was a promise to which i have to live up for rest of my life!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shantaram : Revisted

2010-06-07T02:40:00.000-07:00

Few lines from SHANTARAM ...

About Love...

"The ancient Sanskrit legends speak of destined love,a Karmik connection between souls that are fated to meet and collide and enrapture one another. The legends say that the loved one is instantly recognized because she is loved in every gesture,every expression of thought,every movement,every sound,and every mood that prays in her mind. The legends say that we know her by her wings - the wings that only we can see - and because wanting her kills every other desire of love".

"The same legends also carry warnings that such fated love may, sometimes, be the possession and the obsession of one, and the only one, of the two souls twinned by destiny. But the wisdom, in one sense is opposite of love. love survives in us precisely because it isn't wise".

About India...

"The simple and astonishing truth about India and Indian people is that when you go there, and deal with them, your heart always guide more wisely than your head. There is nowhere else in this world where that's quite so true".

About past...

The past reflects eternally between two mirrors - the bright mirror of words and deeds, and the dark one, full of things we didn't do or say".

Thoughts of author as Karla(female character) stares at him...

"I liked the way she held my eyes until the precise moment when it stopped being comfortable, and then smiled, softening the assail, but never looked away".

About his(author's situation at one time...

No-one, and nothing, could really hurt me. No-one and nothing, could really make me happy. I was tough, which is probably the saddest thing you can say about a man".

Discussion between Author and Karla

Karla: Yes (i like you), you are a good listener. That's dangerous, because it's so hard to resist. Being listened to - really listened to - is the second-best thing in the world.
Author: What's the first best thing?
Karla: Everybody knows that. The best thing in the world is power.
Author: Oh, is it? What about sex?
Karla: No.Apart from the biology,sex is all about power. That's why it is such a rush.

Author's view about best thing in the world

"I don't know. May be just the freedom to say NO. If you've got that much freedom, you really don't need any more".

Karla's view about freedom

"it's funny, but i think it's more important to have the freedom to say YES".

Karla's view about friendship

"Friendship is something that gets harder to understand, every damn year of life. Friendship is like a kind of algebra test that nobody passes. In my worst moods, I think the best you can say is that a friend is anyone you don't despise".

Buridan's ass

2010-06-02T22:26:00.000-07:00

American political cartoon, circa 1900, on the debate over whether to build a canal through Panama or Nicaragua. The deliberations of Congress (choosing between a Panama canal route or a Nicaragua canal route, with allusion to Buridan's ass).[Source ]

======================================================
Got this interesting word in mail from Wordsmith

Buridan's ass

PRONUNCIATION:

(byoo-RUHD-uhnz ass)

MEANING:

noun: A situation demonstrating the impracticality of decision-making using pure reason, especially a situation involving two equal choices.

ETYMOLOGY:

Named after French philosopher Jean Buridan (1300-1358).

NOTES:

Imagine a hungry donkey standing equidistant from two identical piles of hay. The donkey tries to decide which pile he should eat first and finding no reason to choose one over another, starves to death. This paradox didn't originate with Buridan -- it's been found back in Aristotle's time. A hungry and thirsty man cannot decide whether to slake his thirst first or his hunger, and dies. Buridan, in his commentaries on Aristotle, chose a dog, but his critics, in their parody of Buridan, turned it into an ass. So Buridan's ass was named after a person who neither proposed the paradox nor picked that animal to discuss it.
Buridan studied under William of Ockham (of Ockham's razor fame).

USAGE:

"Unless we felt strongly enough to exert ourselves in one direction rather than another, we would do nothing, but would suffer the fate of Buridan's ass."
A.C. Grayling; Though Euphoria Will Fade, Hope Springs Eternal; The Canberra Times (Australia); Nov 12, 2008.

Rebirth of an Insomnaic ...

2010-06-01T21:39:00.000-07:00

July 2004

( Vikas Sharma,Prateek Srivastava,Rahul Verma,Nirupam..... )

I was not as happy as I was that day ( getting Mining in NIT Rkl was not a reason, at least not at that time ) since I got my IIT,AIEEE results.Everything seemed devastated and going to NIT Rourkela was just a way to escape from monotonicity of mental tension.

Just came from college and directly went to common room to see whether TT table was occupied or not.Thankfully it was occupied, occupied by my friends only( coz it was almost impossible to find that table unoccupied)..threw notebooks on chair nearby (In the same manner as a Guy would throw his clothes before going to bed with a pretty girl )... and asked one of the player " are yaar de na..bas 10 min.. "...

He pointed towards the opponent and said " are yaar main to abhi aaya hun .. wo pichale 1 ghante se khel raha hain ..usase le na.." .. i swiftly moved towards other one and asked.. he said... "1 game bas.. sirf ek ... sirf ek ... " .... then started watching tv on a chair nearby ....

meanwhile i was like.. asking scores to confirm that they haven't start the next match silently...when match reaches to its results... i used to stand up from seat and set my eye on players racket ... once it was in my hand...that feeling is really cant be replaced by anything... it would go undisturbed till 01-02 am......

To be continued ....

Complicated Me...

2010-06-01T00:12:00.000-07:00

Once again I arrive.....

My dreams

My dreams are like
cold mountains
hard to climb
hard to forget
I remain clung to
the rope
rope of hope...

My hope
My hope is like
Tip of iceberg
drowns down
with scorching heat
of situations
rises again
with chilling words
of my friends

My friends
My friends are like
brightest stars
near(PUNE,MUMBAI,KOLKATA) and far(Columbus) {bebo,uddy,Rambo,chahca,vindi,nikey }

I get their light
every time I need
silent observers of my nature
bonded to this weird creature...

Moments ..

2010-05-30T22:22:00.000-07:00

A poem after a long pause ................................................................

Moments

==========

Moments above
Moments below
Moments behind
Moments ahead
We were alive
We are dead....

Swimming hard
in the moments flow

From molten lead
to liquid blue
It's a delight
when i am with you....

Moment is chirpy
varies without hault
Moment is angry
not ours but moment's fault...

Moment is yellow
Moment is pitch black...
some times its rosy..
some times its empty..color.. it lacks..

It gathers..
turns into deserts of past
and scatters again
in the future so vast ..

Mingled in future
past lies motionless
a total illusion
making this present a total mess...

See..how strong is this
how strong is this moment
there is no past.. no future..no present
if this tiny moment.. cease to increment ...

software Testing

2010-04-27T00:23:00.000-07:00

A poem,written long ago in some meeting..........

Hey Idiot
Where are you
Time is passing
Defects are few

Yes Mam,
I am trying hard
I am a newbie
Not a wizard

Doesn't matter
How much Idiot are you
Break it fast
Or your days here are few

No No .. please don't do it
for this job I am totally fit
I am a born pessimist
this application can't resist

ok ok ...
speak less and act more
or you know
the way to door

she goes
and i begin to test
garbage of some one else
we clean, without any rest

Ramblings again ...

2010-04-14T02:52:00.003-07:00

I turn on the idiot box and watch the idiotic news.. and other idiotic faces .. known as politician. Everyday it tests my patience and may be ..yours too... but what we do is also very much idiotically nothing.In this post i am trying to put my anguish in words.. i know i am not good at it... the stanzas may not rhyme much or may not leave a impact on anyone or may seem misplaced... but some part of me says " something is better than nothing ".

Hello fellas

what are you looking at ?

If you can move aside

i will also have a look at that ...

yeah ... why not ..

this is meant for you

only idiots like you

can imagine that it will be true..

I move ahead tearing all the stares

amid all crows feeling like a swan

there lied a yellow paper

saying “ Mera Bharat Mahan”

picking up that piece of paper

with lurching legs i moved ahead

am i hallucinating

or am i the only living being in city of dead

ain't our ancestors died for this country

or was that a breed some other

everyday we make this practicality of life a rope

to strangle our mother.....

who can a sane live in a distorted world

randomness around me, is making me crazy

goals with which we started years ago

seems infinitely distant and quite hazy ...

sane or insane.. i am not going to run away

and hope that everyone reading this feel the same

lets vow together to be the true son of soil

forgetting the difference of religion and name .....

Don't you dare to quit!

2010-04-06T20:42:00.000-07:00

The Don't Quit Poem!

===============

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill,
When the funds are low and the debts are high,
And you want to smile, but you have to sigh,
When care is pressing you down a bit,
Rest, if you must, but don't you quit.

Life is queer with its twists and turns,
As every one of us sometimes learns,
And many a failure turns about,
When he might have won had he stuck it out;
Don't give up though the pace seems slow--
You may succeed with another blow.

Often the goal is nearer than,
It seems to a faint and faltering man,
Often the struggler has given up,
When he might have captured the victor's cup,
And he learned too late when the night slipped down,
How close he was to the golden crown.

Success is failure turned inside out--
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt,
And you never can tell how close you are,
It may be near when it seems so far,
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit--
It's when things seem worst that you must not quit.

- Author unknown

कुछ पीले पन्ने

2010-03-08T02:12:00.000-08:00

I was sitting idle in my room, and looking at the photos from the past and that stark change became visible.. It has always been there but sometimes it takes eternity to recognize the obvious things.And then I decided to write a poem, just to say A BIG THANKS ( i know it can not suffice the sacrifices made by them) to my parents on behalf of me and my sister for such a beautiful journey so far.....

आज रात बैठे

जब आँख डबडबा आयी तो

तन्हाई ने पूछा

क्या हुआ मेरे भाई ?

मैं हँसा और कहा

कुछ बातें पुरानी

दबी थी जो दिल में

आज याद आयी...

इक खाली कमरा

धूल भरा आँगन

इक टूटी खाट

और उसमें भी ख़ुशी थी समाई..

थाम कर वो मोटी ऊँगली

चला करता था दौडते दौडते

पकोड़े जलेबी का देते थे साथ

चाय की सुगंध चारों और थी रमाई ...

दर्द था उसकी आँखों में

जब मार रही थी वो मुझको

जब पडोसी के बच्चे से

मैं कर आया लडाई.....

सुबह से शाम तक

दौडते थे(हैं) वो हमारे लिए

सोचता हूँ क्या कभी

कर सकूँगा भरपाई ??

मांगता हूँ बस यही

कुछ अच्छा करें हम

जिससे चहरे पे उनके

बस ख़ुशी रहे छाई .....

Just a forwarded mail ???

2010-02-04T03:37:00.000-08:00

I generally don't read forwarded mails,but this one ( From Chachajaan AKA Ashish Gupta ) was really eye opening, so posting that here.... ( I don't claim the verity of things.. but if this is true.. then on who's name we are rechristening our streets,hospitals,colleges ??? THINK!!! )

VERY INTERESTING HISTORY!
++++++++++++++++++++++++

At the very beginning of his book, 'The Nehru Dynasty',
Astrologer K.N. Rao mentions the names of Jawaharlal's father and
grandfather. Jawaharlal's father was believed to be Motilal and Motilal's
father was one Gangadhar Nehru.

We all know that Jawaharlal's only daughter was Indira
Priyadarshini Nehru; Kamala Nehru was her mother, who died in
Switzerland of tuberculosis. She was totally against Indira's proposed marriage
with Feroze. Why? No one tells us that!

Now, who is this Feroze? We are told by many that
he was the son of the family grocer. The grocer supplied wines,
etc..to Anand Bhavan (previously known as Ishrat Manzil)

What was the family grocer's name? One frequently hears that Rajiv Gandhi's grandfather was Pandit Nehru. But then we all know that everyone has two
grandfathers, the paternal and the maternal grandfathers.

In fact, the paternal grandfather is deemed to be the
more important grandfather in most societies.

Why is it then, nowhere, we find Rajiv Gandhi's paternal
grandfather' s name? It appears that the reason is simply. Rajiv
Gandhi's paternal grandfather was a Muslim gentleman from the
Junagadh area of Gujarat .

This Muslim grocer by the name of Nawab Khan, had married
a Parsi woman after converting her to Islam.

This is the source where from the myth of Rajiv being
a Parsi was derived. Rajiv's father Feroze, was Feroze Khan before
he married Indira, against Kamala Nehru's wishes.

Feroze's mother's family name was Ghandy, often associated
with Parsis and this was changed to Gandhi, sometime before his
wedding with Indira, by an affidavit.

The fact of the matter is that (and this fact can be found
in many writings) Indira was very lonely. Chased out of the
Shantiniketan University by Guru Dev Rabindranath himself for misdemeanour, the lonely girl was all by herself, while father Jawaharlal was busy with
politics,pretty women and illicit sex, the mother was in hospital.

Feroze Khan, the grocer's son was then in England and
he was quite sympathetic to Indira and soon enough she changed her
religion,became a Muslim woman and married Feroze Khan in a London mosque.

Nehru was not happy, Kamala was dead already or dying.
The news of this marriage eventually reached Mohandas Karamchand
Gandhi (better known as Mahatma Gandhi) .

Gandhi urgently called Nehru and practically ordered him
to ask the young man to change his name from Khan to Gandhi. It had
nothing to do with change of religion, from Islam to Hinduism for instance.
It was just a case of a change of name by an affidavit. And so
Feroze Khan became Feroze Gandhi.

The surprising thing is that the apostle of truth, the
old man soon to be declared India 's Mahatma and the 'Father of the
Nation' didn't mention this game of his in the famous book,
'My Experiments with Truth'. Why?

When they returned to India , a mock 'Vedic marriage' was
instituted for public consumption.

On this subject, writes M.O. Mathai (a long-time Private
Secretary of Nehru) in his renowned (but now suppressed by the GOI!) 'Reminiscences of the Nehru Age' on page 94, second paragraph: ' For some
inexplicable reason, Nehru allowed the marriage to be performed according to
Vedic rite in 1942. An inter-religious and inter-caste marriage under Vedic
rites at that time was not valid in law. To be legal, it had to be a civil marriage .'

It's a known fact that after Rajiv's birth Indira and
Feroze lived separately, but they were not divorced. Feroze used
to harass Nehru frequently for money and also interfere in Nehru's
political activities. Nehru got fed up and left instructions not to allow him
into the Prime Minister's residence Trimurthi Bhavan.

Mathai writes that the death of Feroze came as a relief
to Nehru and Indira. The death of Feroze in 1960 before he could
consolidate his own political forces, is itself a mystery. Feroze had even
planned to remarry.

Those who try to keep tabs on our leaders in spite of
all the suppressions and deliberate misinformation, are aware of the
fact that the second son of Indira (or Mrs .Feroze Khan) known as Sanjay
Gandhi was not the son of Feroze. He was the son of another Muslim
gentleman, Mohammad Yunus.

Here in passing, we might mention that the second son
was originally named Sanjiv. It rhymed with Rajiv, the elder
brother's name. It was changed to Sanjay when he was arrested by the British
police in England and his passport impounded, for having stolen a car.

Krishna Menon was then India 's High Commissioner in London .
He offered to issue another passport to the felon who changed his
name to Sanjay. Incidentally, Sanjay's marriage with the Sikh
girl Menaka (now they call her Maneka for Indira Gandhi found the
name of mythological Lord Indra's Court dancer rather offensive !!) took
place quite surprisingly in Mohammad Yunus's house in New Delhi

The marriage with Menaka who was a model (She had model
for Bombay Dyeing wearing just a towel) was not so ordinary either.
Sanjay was notorious in getting unwed young women pregnant. Menaka
too was rendered pregnant by Sanjay.

It was then that her father, Colonel Anand, threatened
Sanjay with dire consequences if he did not marry her daughter and
that did the trick.

Sanjay married Menaka. It was widely reported in Delhi
at the time that Mohammad Yunus was unhappy at the marriage of
Sanjay with Menaka. Apparently he had wanted to get him married with a Muslim girl of his choice. It was Mohammad Yunus who cried the most
when Sanjay died in the plane accident.

In Yunus's book, 'Persons, Passions & Politics' one
discovers that baby Sanjay had been circumcised following Islamic
custom, although the reason stated was phimosis. It was always believed
that Sanjay used to blackmail Indira Gandhi and due to this she used
to turn a blind eye when Sanjay Gandhi started to run the country as
though it were his personal freedom.. Was he black mailing her with
the secret of who his real father was? When the news of Sanjay's
death reached Indira Gandhi, the first thing she wanted to know was
about the bunch of keys which Sanjay had with him.

Nehru was no less a player in producing bastards.
At least one case is very graphically described by M.O. Mathai in
his 'Reminiscences of the Nehru Age', page 206.

Mathai writes:

'In the autumn of 1948 a young woman from Benares arrived
in New Delhi as a sanyasini named Shraddha Mata (an assumed and not
a real name). She was a Sanskrit scholar well versed in the ancient Indian
scriptures and mythology. People, including MPs, thronged to her to hear her
discourses. One day S.D. Upadhyaya, Nehru's old employee, brought a
letter in Hindi from Shraddha Mata. Nehru gave her an interview in the PM's house. As she departed, I noticed (Mathai is speaking here) that she was
young, shapely and beautiful. Meetings of Nehru with her became rather
frequent, mostly after he finished his work at night. During one of Nehru's
visits to Lucknow , Shraddha Mata turned up there and Upadhyaya
brought a letter from her as usual. Nehru sent her the reply and she visited
Nehru at midnight...'

Suddenly Shraddha Mata disappeared.

In November 1949 a convent in Bangalore sent a decent
looking person to Delhi with a bundle of letters. He said that a
young woman from northern India arrived at the convent a few months ago
and gave birth to a baby boy. She refused to divulge her name or give any
particulars about herself. She left the convent as soon as she was well
enough to move out but left the child behind.

She however forgot to take with her a small cloth bundle
in which, among other things, several letters in Hindi were found.
The Mother Superior, who was a foreigner, had the letters examined and
was told they were from the Prime Minister.

The person who brought the letters surrendered them...'I
(Mathai) made discreet inquiries repeatedly about the boy but failed
to get a clue about his whereabouts. Convents in such matters are
extremely tight-lipped and secretive.

Had I succeeded in locating the boy, I would have adopted
him. He must have grown up as a Catholic Christian blissfully
ignorant of who his father was.'

Coming back to Rajiv Gandhi, we all know now that he changed
his so called Parsi religion to become a Catholic to marry Sania
Maino of Turin , Italy . Rajiv became Roberto. His daughter's
name is Bianca and son's name is Raul. Quite cleverly the same
names are presented to the people of India as Priyanka and Rahul.

What is amazing is the extent of our people's ignorance
in such matters. The press conference that Rajiv Gandhi gave in
London after taking over as Prime minister of India was very informative.

In this press conference, Rajiv boasted that he was NOT a Hindu but a Parsi.
Mind you, speaking of the Parsi religion, he had no Parsi ancestor
at all.
His grandmother (father's mother) had turned Muslim after having
abandoned the Parsi religion to marry Nawab Khan.

It is the western press that waged a blitz of misinformation
on behalf of Rajiv. From the New York Times to the Los Angeles Times
and the Washington Post, the big guns raised Rajiv to heaven. The
children's encyclopaedias recorded that Rajiv was a qualified Mechanical
Engineer from the revered University of Cambridge . No doubt US kids are
among the most misinformed in the world today! The reality is that in
all three years of his tenure at that University Rajiv had not
passed a single exam. He had therefore to leave Cambridge without a
certificate.

Sonia too had the same benevolent treatment. She was stated
to be a student in Cambridge . Such a description is calculated to
mislead Indians. She was a student in Cambridge all right, but not of the
University of Cambridge , but of one of those fly by night language schools
where foreign students come to learn English. Sonia was working as an 'au pair'
girl in Cambridge and trying to learn English at the same time. And
surprise of surprises, Rajiv was even cremated as per Vedic rites in full
view of India's public.

This is the Nehru dynasty that India worships and now
a foreigner leads a prestigious national party because of just one
qualification being married into the Nehru family. Maneka Gandhi, though Indian, herself is being accepted by the non-Congress parties not because
she was a former model or an animal lover, but for her links to the Nehru
family.

Saying that an Italian (or any foreigner) should not lead
India will amount to narrow mindedness, but if Sania Maino (now
Sonia) had served India like, say, Mother Teresa or Annie Besant, i.e. in any
way on her own rights, then all Indians should be proud of her just as
how proud we are of Mother Teresa.

OR

Saying that any other party which comes to rule
India is better is again equally worse.

The point is Indians who nominate the people to stand
in these elections; and the people who vote their rulers (i.e. the
authorities) must know that truth eventually come out some day. Don't
allow the famous land of India (our motherland) to be looked down
by others.

मेरी राष्ट्भाषा हिंदी ...

2010-01-24T19:12:00.000-08:00

आज जब अनायास मन मे हिन्दी में लिखने की इच्छा हुई तो ऐसा लगा जैसे लेखिनी शब्दों के मोड़ ही लेना भूल गयी हो , कम्बख़्त, कई युगों से इसकी जरूरत ही नहीं पड़ी!
यूँही बैठे-बैठे, जब चूहा-दौड़ मैं तल्लीन मष्तिष्क साँस लेने के लिए कुछ देर रुका तो सहसा इस कुंठित मन में एक प्रश्न उठ खड़ा हुआ ॥ “ आख़िरी बार मैने हिन्दी में कब लिखा?”

इस प्रश्न को लेकर जब व्यथित मान ने मष्तिष्क के द्वार पर दस्तक लगाई तो झुंझलाए दिमाग़ ने अकड़ते हुए कहा “ तू चाहे राष्ट्र भाषा के नाम पर कितने ही इमोसनल अत्याचार कर ले, पर यह सारा ज़मान ही मेरे वाशिभूत हैं॥ यह युग ही गोरों की भाषा का हैं, हम तो तीसरी दुनिया हैं ॥ आगे बढ़ने के लिए उनका पीछा करने का ही तो मार्ग हमें सीखाया गया हैं .. यहाँ तक की शिक्षण पद्धति भी तो हमें "मेकाले" से उधार लेने पड़ी.. भाषा तो बाद मैं आती हैं ..”

“ और हां , तुम्हारे सवाल का जवाब.. अंतिम बार इस भले मानुस ने सात साल पहले बोर्ड परीक्षा में हिन्दी की बिंदी उडाई थी “

इतना सुन कर तो मन और भी व्यथित हो गया, मन की यह हालत देख, दिमाग़ बोला.. “ अरे यह तो फिर भी ठीक हैं .. इसने बारह साल तो हिन्दी सरिता का पानी पिया.. अगली नसल की फसल को तो अँग्रेज़ी मिनरल वॉटर ही मिलेगा “

मन की दशा तो और भी दयनीय हो गयी... परंतु बेचारा कर भी क्या सकता था..सिवाय इसके की मुझे कुछ देर बिठा कर यह सब लिखवाता .. वो भी हिन्दी में ... “

उसे तो और भी लिखवाना था पर मष्तिष्क बीच मैं टपक पड़ा .. “ चल भाई ड्यूटी ख़तम, अब इसे बेचारे को कल के साक्षात्कार की तैयारी करने दे... बेचारे को कुछ अतिरिक्त प्रयास करना पड़ेगा... हिन्दी माध्यम का विद्यार्थी जो ठहरा.. “

An earnest request....

2010-01-19T02:23:00.000-08:00

A rosy letter...
----------------------

My dear blossomed flower
this letter is for you
time is little and so are the words
but i hope it will go through

You are always sweet
giving your fragrance to me
and what i do to you ?
behaving rudely, no fear of thee?

This is not me
if it is an acceptable reason?
no, its not real me
may be heat of this cold season ?? :(

But If required
I'll try to change
and will change you also
as a revenge !! ;)

All you need to know
is love of bee towards flower
be happy, remain happy
rain is on strike, some day it'll shower!!

२६ / ११

2009-11-26T04:44:00.000-08:00

इस बार नहीं !!!

What?
Firing?
Where?
Taj? Trident? Nariman house?
Who?
Terrorists?
How many?
174 dead?

Every thing has been painted red
even the head of police is dead
lets watch the news,lets go to cafe coffee day
hurry,otherwise there wont be any space in the bay

Why do they do it
do they enjoy this shit??
ain't they love their life
don't they care for mother,father, son or wife?
*******
*****
***
**
*
Now after an year
when we look back
shamelessly we do business of living
we say a lot,actions we lack!!

Just a post...

2009-11-15T20:58:00.000-08:00

Just came from office, after having heavy Sambhar-Rice of Andhra-Mess.The effort they put in satisfying their customers is remarkable ( Waddya say Chachajaan? ).Though the language may be different but the way in which they serve you is such that you'll feel at home.

Anyways.. with a full stomach, I asked my friend .. What about a belly on this lean body .. She smiled and looked away ... ,I ignored Bhel Puri Center on the side of the road ..I am too stuffed with that rice -sambhar that even smell of edibles can make me vomit straight away--- Andhra mess zindabaad!!( Reminds me of Shree Ashapuri Bhojanalaya .. where I and Udi used to have Dal-Bati with two full spoons of Ghee.. I wonder, How that Bengali got used to those Hard Balls? ).

Anyways I firmly stuck to the promise, which I made to myself, Promise about being happy.All the way I was chortling and made my friend laugh.Every one likes you when you are smiling ..whenever you remain sad and silent in public with your lips upside down .. you loose a point somewhere (leaving out the exceptions).... Reminds me of a line from Shantaram : " If your fate
doesn't make you laugh, then perhaps you didn't get the joke".

As i say good night to my friend and head towards my flat, my mind thinks about several things.. I think about my shirts which will require my attention on urgent basis as I had put them in arial water yesterday and forgot to wash.. I think about yesterday's walk from same lane ... where I created plot of my new post, but never wrote... I think about my routine after reaching home, it reminds me that my laptop ( OK laptop provided by IBM) doesn't have much songs in
it, so I buy a LATA - RAFI cd, which eventually turned out to be a tribute to their work by Vipin Sachdev and Sadhana Sargam.

Thoughts dont have any end.. But roads do have, and I reach to my flat.Today also cable is not working and not sure whether its due to Non Payment of its dues or due to yesterday's rain.One of the poster in my room says : " Mistakes - The only real mistake is the one from which we learn nothing". But human nature has a very interesting thing about it, it bends the meaning
of rules,lines in such a way that to accommodate his/her desire.And I am also a human being, I took it like this "For quite a some time I haven't read the novel which I bought with huge enthusiasm, so lets start reading that ( leaving the work at hand.. Ok I may look like i am a nikkama, nalayak kinda creature but I too have some work sometimes)".

So I start reading "Life of Pi".Here are some lines which I liked ( I hope you like these too):

"Scientists are a friendly,atheistic,hard-working,beer-drinking lot whose minds are preoccupied with sex,chess and baseball when they are not preoccupied with science".

"When you have suffered a great deal in life, each additional pain is both unbearable and trifling."

But one line in Fountainhead says just opposite to it :

Howard Roark says "Everything goes to a point and then, it doesn't even matter".

In broader sense I think later one is correct .. what do you say public???

***********************************************************************************
I don't know why but I find this post bit boring, So I leave you with a perfect piece from Udi :

The light from the distant light house...
kissing their foreheads...
softly...yet assuringly??

As if in a bid...
a bid to bid good bye??
and there I stand on your shores..
bruised yet not tired....

Give me your winds..
to assuage my pain....
to damp my spirits you sent rain...
It merely rejuvenated my vibrant heart....

Painted....
my skies in rainbow colors...
your Sun...
did betray...
the trust was failed...
yet I stand on your shore....
welcoming you with wide open hands...
come and get me...
come...
and take me..
Come...
and
take
me...

Dream

2009-11-12T23:35:00.000-08:00

My Brightest Star
********************************

Awake in my dreams
I search
for a star
I find one
the brightest one
I asked her
do you pull strings?
strings of my fate?
she said "no Idiot"
"I am not your star"
yours is that one
the one hiding behind
she is rare
one of its kind..
I stared in dark
to find the darkest spot
I asked again
"are you talking about that?"
"the one, darker than darkness?"
she smiled.. and nodded in consent
I frowned," my star is not bright"
i smiled but i felt sad
i asked her again
"like my life, my star is also dead?"
she laughed and said with affection
"there is something special about that star"
I smiled and said
"i know.. its a star.. which doesn't twinkle"
she raised her eyebrow and said..
"she is the oldest of all
she has given away her spark
to make others bright..
she is still bright
but you need to see it
see it with eyes of your heart
you're lucky..to have her"
I try to find meaning
thinking hard in my dream
.....
....
..

I just tried to put my dream in some random words... its really difficult to put dreams in words... coz you always remain short of words to express that ...difference between theory and practical?? anyways.. i feel happy ..and as a poster on the wall of my room suggests: "Angry people get hurt and hurt others.. so stay Cool"..

Midnight Ramblings

2009-10-28T21:54:00.000-07:00

What do you say?
********************************

I spent almost more than an hour on deciding what to write... several things came in my mind ... my childhood,college,17-Sunrise Appt. ... My friends goyal,uddy,bebo....

Then I came across this poem from DALJIT NAGRA. I read it and liked it...But it was after an hour or so .. I tried to think about the meaning...I got my own meaning.
Suddenly I became curious about what other people may interpret .. What can be be their story attached to it.....
You all people read it... very few people comment ;) ... what about contributing this time....??? :)

The tree my father grew
from his garden I take an axe

and branch by branch
I break the tree

and set to work
the million maddened bits,

the fire of night.
Only ash I keep.

Midnight Ramblings

2009-10-26T21:05:00.000-07:00

Me,Silence & My Quill

********************************

Sitting alone in my room,struggling with my reveries,I started writing some random lines...underlined with the feelings of heart.. words became darker than silent darkness of midnight....

Today I completed an year in this mess
in its own messy style...
As i lay down in my bed,pull dusty blanket
what I search? Perhaps a smile!

My eyes search darkest spot in the room
is it somewhere in my heart?
Why do I close my eyes to find it
though I know it'll hurt!

Moments rewind upside down
my healthy supper comes first
I can feel myself totally dried up
longing of family? Or is it thirst?

I retreat the road from office to home
preferring private auto over shared one
I throw away money to find comfort
I lose both in chaos around, i get none!

Mind moves to the noon,and heart laughs
one feels heat of life, another? Under addiction!
Everyone laughs and talk over lunch table
I celebrate silently, another day of dissatisfaction!

Ah! Even in dreams i think about my mornings
I wake up to feel heated clock showing ELEVEN
My puzzled mind dwells in puzzled dreams
to find out bloody reason : yesterdays' SOC 7???

My heart's appetence

2009-09-08T02:28:00.000-07:00

DEDICATED TO ANGEL OF MY DREAMS

********************************

In this night,when stars melt
I set out on a walk with moon...
Is the ocean above pouring down
or am i sweating as if its noon...

*

****

***

I dance amid nightingales' songs
i breathe happyness of this moment...
Sun kisses horizon and rises above
as if nodding in self consent...

*

****

***

In her eyes i see my dreams
smell of her beats floret of daisy...
with her i feel complete
i am confident,even if the roads are hazy...

*

****

***

All i need is her affirmation
to this idiot's appentence...
she makes me feel special
adding meaning to my existence...

*

****

***

I know .. I am duffer.. :)

2009-09-07T03:48:00.000-07:00

as i pack my bag
and leave my office
she is on my mind
i board my bus
look at verdant scenery
she is on my mind
i think hard and harder
as the bus accelerates
and the story rewind(s)

-

----

---

Nine years have passed
with love of its kind
I might not have said..
but she has been always on my mind*

-

----

---

I feel lucky
as she showered her love
i was always lip-locked
she remained pure like dove

-

----

---

Feelings will get their words
now this barrier gonna break
today it'll pour from stars
drenched in love,we'll be awake

-

----

---

as I send this letter to you
i unfold
feelings which i kept
close to my heart..

love's never perfect
and i remained a duffer
right from the start...

today I say
may be the words are few
but i can assure
the feelings are true
yes i do, i did from start
you're my love..and "I love you"

-

----

---

यह अलविदा आख़िरी अलविदा तो नहीं

2009-08-23T22:42:00.000-07:00

इक सफ़र पर नये, निकले हैं हम
पर निशान कदमों के यहीं हैं मगर
याद करना हमें, बस लौट आएँगे
खुशी हो या हो गम की डगर ...

दूरियाँ रहेगी दरमियाँ तो भी क्या
साथ अपना यूँही रहेगा सदा
दोस्ती आपकी एक तोहफा हैं जो
लाख तॉहफो से भी हैं लगता बड़ा..

राहें और भी हैं मंज़िलें और भी
यह अलविदा आख़िरी अलविदा तो नहीं
यादों को मेरी तुम यूँही रखना जवां
गर ना भी रहे तो भी मिलेंगे कहीं ....

रोहन की प्रेम कहानी :)

2009-08-20T04:25:00.000-07:00

भाइयों और उनकी बहनों
आज कुछ बातें हैं आपको बतानी
थोड़ी सी हैं खट्टी,थोड़ी मीठी
हमारे रोहन की यह प्रेम कहानी...

माँ की आँख का राज दुलारा
था यह बंदा एकदम सीधा सादा
पढ़ाई मैं एक दम व्यस्त था वो
प्यार का था ना कोई इरादा

आइबीयेम मैं कुछ हुआ असर ऐसा
बेटा निकल पड़ा करने प्यार का Crime
पोवेम्स से करने लगा कूदियाँ घायल
होती ना थी एक भी लाइन without Rhyme...

Hi-Fi रेस्तराँ मैं टाइम लगा कटने
पूजा की पूजा शुरू हुई रात दिन
दीन दुनिया की फिकर ना रही उसको
प्रेम का पूजरी हुआ कुछ ऐसा तल्लीन

पर प्रेम तो हैं भैया बड़ा कठिन
साथ छूट गया पप्पू का बीच राह
पर हिम्मत हारना ना सीखा था उसने
दिल कराह रहा था मगर , मुह से ना निकली आह

बोरिया बिस्तर बाँध हुआ हमारा दोस्त तैयार
बोला USA जाएँगे और लड़की पटाएँगे
एक नहीं मिली तो दूसरी पर आजमाएँगे
"गर्ल नेक्स्ट डोर" की खिड़की खुलवाएँगे :)

Rohan's Farewell Poem

2009-08-20T03:05:00.000-07:00

Everyone could have guessed
What was in your mind
It was never hard to decipher
Silence of that kind...

Now, when everyone knows
And the moment has arrived
We raise a toast
For moments we survived...

Cheerio,cheerio my friend
On this farewell day
In our heart we'll cherish
Yours transient stay

Wishing you love,luck and success
In each and every forthcoming venture
Stroll back sometimes
On the roads of this indenture...

WHY???

2009-08-18T03:21:00.000-07:00

why one has to utter words which others chant...

why can't we do the things, which we want

why one has to keep feelings inside...

why can't one fight with heart's tide..

why one's life is a two side mirror...

a smiling face, sad soul... where's the error?

why does one have to choose erronous destiny ..

why one has to burry dreams.. large or tiny?

why one wastes his time in life's WHYs...

why can't one shut his mouth as he dies...

Friends

2009-07-07T02:39:00.000-07:00

It started on quite low...But you people make it Big...a bunch of people of different nature... still gelled so well.. and we all enjoyed a lot ( specially me!!! ).. just wanted to say thanks!!!

For all mainframe batch IBM :

You people bear my gibberish ....
You exempt when i behave childish ....
You people make me laugh....
I can't return..not even half .....
In the turmoil of life you all came to defend ....
I can proudly say .. You all are my friend

Rambling again ...

2009-06-11T02:45:00.000-07:00

A tear rolled down from my eyes
On second anniversary of our parting
Reflecting the bitterness of an ocean inside
Besotted i remain,couldn't envisage from starting

Trying hard to balance, on the string of tar
Slaps of zephyr,pushing me into the past
Earnest attempts,went in vain,to remain in present
A black hole of past,engluts future so vast

Lost in love,we didn't know,where we were heading
Walking shoulder to shoulder,on the roads unseen
IN the rain of Rourkela,wondering if love was raining
Shivering under the snow of Boston, yet so keen

Sunrise to sunset, we lived in purgatory
Sunset to sunrise, we slept in the bed of word(s)
Everyone wondered if such love can exist
Friend's cautioned,"You'll go mad, have some sleep Nerd!! "

Sometimes I wondered,How life can be so smooth
But I was an idiot,doubted on God's wit
Some steps ahead,was waiting,a storm pretty rough
It snatched away everything , though bit by bit

Labyrinth,bumps are always parts of the path
But I've been said, "Life is all about going on"
Something wakes me up and I look back at the road
A driver was snarling "Out of your mind?? You Moron!!! "

Untitled...

2009-05-04T23:29:00.001-07:00

Days are boring and nights are boring
Hey!! don't disturb, even if i am snoring

Hey!! why are you laughing from the corner of lips
Donchyu have any dreams..need some tips??

Look.. look at you.. how boring youhave become..
Your life has been kidnaped..arrange ransome..

Soul craving for life..body tied to this chair
Eyes are broken and gloomy face need some repair..

Is this life or purgatory,or heart's strife..
Won't you regret..looking back at this life

Boredom grips....

2009-03-25T23:34:00.000-07:00

Sitting on my desk
Staring at blank screen
I think hard
Switching moods in between

I click here and there
Withot any reason
Refreshing my mail box
A blank one,like every season

A sudden want of coffee
Dies as i have it in my hand
I gulp it without any senses
10th till now,what a trend???

I listen to music
With volume at its peak
To avoid everything including me
I am alone,nothing i seek ...

Crammed with thoughts... once again !!!!

2009-03-25T21:17:00.000-07:00

I have never been a gregarious person and each and every time it nettled persons around me.I thought that after coming here i'll improve,but recuperation is not always assured, isn't it??

I have always been bemoaned that my physical presence was not acompained by my soul, but isn't it something which no one can help???

The same thing happened few days ago and I was again damned for my behaviour and this time with some reasons which, they felt ( which I refute!!! ), were the behind my broken eyes.Anyways i don't have any desire to redress anything.

Talking about day to day life ...its colourless and elusive.. each and every time you think you have got hold of it it shows her bestial tricks.

.....hmmm, a lot to write but again Crammed with thoughts!!!

Vacuum Inside...

2009-03-23T21:11:00.000-07:00

I walk , I talk
I sleep and I eat
Still lacking something
To whom do I cheat?

I watch movies
And listen to the songs
I think very less
Neither care about wrongs

I cook, I read
I earn some dime
But life is boring
Like this this rhyme

I decided not to look
In future and the past
But again loneliness grips
In the world so vast

Everyday it is a fight
Against vacuum and dirt
Can anyone suggest
Cure of this heart....

Wo valentine divas...

2009-02-04T21:03:00.000-08:00

तडपते दिल को था उसका इंतजार
तेज होता जेया रहा था प्यार कैसा बुखार
चेहरा वही दिखता था बार बार
आएगी वो, बस इतना था ऐतबार....

कहा था उसने,मिलूंगी मैं दोपहर दो बजे
बैचैनि थी छाई,बेक़रारी मैं थे नैन सजे
मुकाम पर आ बैठा मैं पूरे दो घंटे पहले
हाथों मैं गुलाब और आँखें कॅरीयिंग ख्वाब सुनहले

धीरे धीरे हमारी बैचैनि बढ़ने लगी
दिल की मशीन नये सपने गढ़ने लगी
घुमाया फोने हमने और पूछा.."डार्लिंग कब आओगी"
इंतेज़ार की आग मैं भून कर क्या मुझे खाओगि..???

आवाज़ सुनकर उसकी, दिल पर प्यार बेसुंमार छाया
"बस चंद घड़ियाँ और" सुनकर दिल को क़रार आया
रोज़ की बात अलग थी, आज तो " सैंट वॅलिंटाइन दिवस" था
आज तो रहता हैं हर दिल को इंतेज़ार किसी ना किसी का

रोज़ी रोज़ी ड्रेस मैं इठलाती बलखाती वो आई...
देखकर उसको दिल ने मेरे छलाँग लगाई
गुलाब देकर उसे,गले मिलने को हमने हाथ बढ़ाए..
कुछ हुआ ऐसा की, चूर हुए वो, जो थे ख्वाब सजाए..

अब रोज़ का रंग केसरिया नज़र आया...
"मारो इनको" कोई पीछे से चिल्लाया...
चारों तरफ उठ रहे थे धनुष-बान और त्रिशूल
आवाज़ एक ही सुनाई दी हुमको.."ज़िंदाबाद बजरंग दल"

फिर वो हुआ जिसे सोच आज भी दिल दुखाता हैं ...
हर वॅलिंटाइन दिवस पर एक तूफान सा उठता हैं ..
वो मंज़र जब उन्होने चप्पल हमारे सर पर थी बज़वाई...
उसके बाद ... हाए हाए...रोज़ी से राखी जो थी बँधवाई......

The longest Bath ...

2009-01-05T05:28:00.000-08:00

I was standing under shower .. the chilled shots were nailing hard, with each and every drop i was being pushed towards the well of my memories.. the memories still in air like those particles during early days of childhood when we had that ground made of sand (ok!! i agree, we had no furnished ground at all, but i am suffering from diseases called as OPTIMISM and CONTENT... ). At that moment, if someone had asked me what i would like to be in my life.. i would have easily said ... "An officer in the bank in Gandhi Chowk ( A place which have a lots of landmarks like "Madhyamik school", "Dalluji's kachauri shop"... etcetera ... )which is having doors made of glass.. (Bank of Rajasthan .. being precisely ) ...

Scientist may boast about the MAC speeds of their air crafts .. but i bet,we have something much faster than that .. and that is "wheel of time" ... ambitions, desires,dreams and situations changes drastically as soon as you blink your eyelid.
As I grown older.. everything changed...if my goals had changed, it would have been better .. but the thing which changed was " i was without a goal" .. though i used to be in top 3 of class all the time but never made an effort to do this ... ?( i realized this later when i had to face fierce competition .. and i continued with same attitude and not to mention that I failed!!! )

"We don't know what we got, until we say GOODBYE to that" ... I felt this thing at times.... I used to curse my school (ADARSH VIDHYA MANDIR) ... but what I found lately was, It was the best school I have ever been to or have heard of!!!

"This life is as good as you see it" ... very true ... If you live for the moments then you will never find a moment wasted.. because these moments only make the LIFE TIME .. isn't it???? .... ( sounds too philosophical haan ???? )

"BOOKS and MUSIC are your best buddies " ...3rd year of college... a lots of things changed...a lots of HIGH and LOW moments... I wouldn't have been able to come out, if we hadn't had these two friends with me (thanks to my computer, thanks to my parents too.. they financed it :) ) ... What I discovered, I was missing this vast ocean of knowledge badly ... they taught me, helped me to pass my time...and alleviated the pain at the same time....and Music??? ... It kept me high on my spirits....

"Count you CHICKENS before they hatch, but never put pressure of performing" .... Its necessary to expect results .. but when we start expecting a lot from ourselves, we end up underperformed... I learned these things after I failed at IIT JEE exam ( but did i fail if I was able to learn this thing?? ) ....

"Patience is the important ingredient of the recipe called as SUCCESS"... It has been five months here ... I know, I am not enjoying the JOB here..though its giving me enough money ... But there is always a suitable time to make the right move ... A suitable time to pursue my interests ... :) ... I am enjoying this time too .. though I don't like much of it...

"Your parents did the best job, they knew how to do " .... whatever I am today is the outcome of my parents efforts .... they went through rough periods to provide me bright days.. and breezy mornings.... and when they are happy ... you have the best time of your life... The trip last week was the best time ( outside home) I ever had...(though i missed sis,jeeju and suryansh ... a lot)....

With all things running in my mind... Dreaming about new heights .. I came out of the shower ( with a positive mindset) . ... this had been the longest bath of my life .... and most refreshing too... :) .... its time for some Pooja ... so Over 'n' Out!!!

Without KARMA

2009-01-01T04:11:00.000-08:00

Getting bored... sitting idle... doing nothing .. this is what i write ..

this termite of time is eating me
so called intelligent mind is beating me
blood oozing out, and head goes light
trying to open my eyes, with all my might

what i see, is a blank screen of dark future
a tragic story,with all means of torture
songs, novels, coffee are my mates
getting old, lazy with passing dates

oh god!!! where am i heading
colorful dreams have now grey shading
turning into a creature of no KARMA
no LIFE if no KARMA, isn't it said by DHARMA????

that night...

2008-12-30T01:17:00.000-08:00

a bottle of wine and bed sheet of silk
and those stars twinkling in eyes
glistened in love,you stood,as white as milk
as the aurora arrives from different skies

those goosebumps on your skin
reminding the chill of early dawn
those sensuous lips above the chin
defying the beauty of dew in lawn

your moves as alcoholic as that wine
standing there, staring you with the lurching mind
getting crazy, loosing control of mine
i wish if this night could rewind

a smile prevails on your lips, seeing that empty bottle
we both shared same feeling but this cruel job
how can we part now, after that full night throttle
but still, i depart feeling the cold of that steel knob!!!

its world of JOHN GALT!!!!

2008-12-29T02:43:00.000-08:00

I know .. why you hate me
i know.. the reason of your anger
I know.. what makes you worry
I know.. why you weak are together

Because .. once again you are scared
Because... you have limbs made of sand
Because...once again you are out of your senses
Because... you don't own this land

Lemme remind...the oath which you took
Lemme remind...its today .. My DAY
Lemme remind...i am the king here
Lemme remind...you have a debt to PAY

You decide...where do you want to go?
You decide...you want air to breathe,water to drink???
You decide...your own fate and foe
you decide...where do you want to go, when earth shrink(S)???

A last chance...for you to survive
A last chance...to choose sweet or salt
A last chance...to make sweat as your god
A last chance...to enter,its world of JOHN GALT!!!!

sapanon ka gaon...

2008-12-24T02:58:00.001-08:00

ae rab!! aaj bata mujhe, yeh pyaar vyaar kya hota hain
yeh dil anzaani rahon main, kya isiliye hi khota hain
tu bata mujhe, tu bata mujhe, main aaj pyaar main paagal hun
sunana chahu tujhse main,kya main woh awaara badal hun

masti karta hun,dhun main rahata hun
zarre zarre, patte patte se , aaj main kyun ye kahata hun
zaldi uthkar, pagal pawan sa , dhuan dhuan main bahata hun
apane man ke laddu khakar, meetha dard sa sahata hun

yeh aaj ladakpan ki masti, pahle kabhi na aayee thi
tere aane se pahle, ik udaasi si chayee thi
main mahak raha hun , chahak raha hun, angaare sa dahak raha hun
peene wale bhi dang hain aise,main bina piye hi bahak raha hun

bas yeh mausam beete kabhi na,kabhi na yeh shaam dhale
jahan tak jaaye meri manzil,wahaan tu mere saath chale
dhoop bahut dekhi hian maine, tere aanchal ki chaon mile
tum-hum, hum-tum, rahate ho jahaan, wo sapanon ka gaon mile !!!

death of my past...

2008-12-24T01:50:00.001-08:00

drenched in the rain of pain
i am here to write again
i wont write about sorrow
that is the color of tomorrow

but, then, is there any other thing to write
any other sky for my small kite
here the winds are blowing hard
no limit table, too costly for my card(s)

i will sing for happIness in pain
this pain will not go in vain
this crying face, i wont forget
no more love and no more regret

why should i think of her
she is beautiful??? i differ
how can she be? without a heart
dummy of lies, a foul piece of art

I am here, without any fear
In the shining future, i'll disappear
where my heart wont scream,total silence, no sounds
death of my past, is the cure of heart's wounds....

I am dead again!!!

2008-12-18T21:28:00.000-08:00

I was totally an innocent guy
truthful, loyal and pure as sky
I never thought I'll have to cry
she'll leave my heart to fry

i was dead, you brought the life
you pulled me out from my own strife
you taught me how to live a day
reminded me the prices i had to pay

but again, things are not forever
you are well, then again its time for fever
the day was over and now it's time for tide
this is the fact,who wants to hide

you left me alone,in middle of journey
i was dead, again on gurney
my mouth was shut, eyes were red
everything rewinding, thread by thread

i was neither burnt nor buried
left me alone and everyone hurried
i stood up alone and walked out
wanted to yell, but couldn't shout

then i saw, dead men walking
with distorted faces they were talking
now i realized the code of the world
in a pot of lies, we've been hurled!!!

Friendship

2008-12-16T04:08:00.000-08:00

today when i woke up
found my heart choked up
choked up with memories
memories with no worries

worries, how could it be there?
when you were around
whatever you said or done
seemed to me like a euphoric sound

i definitely loved you
yes it was purely true
but never wanted to loose a friend
just to follow a foolish trend

i know, can't turn the wheel back
don't know, what's there in future's sack
but i request you with earnest heart
bagging your friendship, i won't ever lack!!!

Mystic AURORA

2008-11-21T03:10:00.000-08:00

stars hinding in the light
moon fighting with all its might
sand twinkling with power so distant
everything changing in a single instant

woolen clouds peeping from dark
rays sketching its bright mark(s)
every thing coming out of nothing
the cool wind seems to be singing

knocking hard, without any noise
you cant ignore, you have no choice
GAEA dancing as the SOL survives
luna departs and the light survives

bidding adieu to beloved sister
brother coming as a destiny twister
amidst all with distinct aura
there stands mystic AURORA.

A coversation ..

2008-11-20T21:36:00.000-08:00

[dilip says]
kya bhai?? kya haal chaal
suna hain, kar rahe tum bawal
dheere dheere aage badhana
pyaar ki sidhi sambhal kar chadhana

[Yudi says]
its love, i know for sure
a feeling,never been so pure
dil ka dard, hard to cure
now its tough to endure

[dilip says]
feeling -weeling kuch nahin hota
isake chakkar main jag hain rota
are yaar tu kahe ko hain khota
pyaar ka saagar, na laga tu gota

[Yudi says]
are yaar.. main bahut serious hun
aage kya hoga,very curious hun
aag ka dariya hain,doob kar jana hain
naa raat ko neend, aur na bhata khana hain

[dilip says]
raam ne kiya, wo tumko ab karana hain
jamana ravan hain, usase ladana hain
gf tumhari seeta, hum laxman ban jayenge
bhai ke liye joote bhi khayenge

[Yudi says]
are yaar, gf is like lonavala's chikki
seeta kah lo tu, par naam hain nikki
ab tum hi batao hum kya karein
itani pyaari gf, kaise na marein

[dilip says]
koi nahin bandhu, tension na lo
retirement se pahle, pension na lo
sab kuch hoga accha, kahata hain yah baccha
bas make it sure, your pyaar is saccha!!!

madhdham madhdham

2008-11-19T00:01:00.000-08:00

Mastana man dole aise
khwaab yeh dekhe kaise kaise
bheega sawan, aur bas hum tum
koi shararat madhdham madhdham

aankhen tumhari neel samundar
aadha- adhura, ik sapana sundar
doob kar bhi lagata hain kam
baras raha kya madhdham madhdham

teri baanhe saara jeevan
tujhse hi to mahka yeh man
bhaari palkein,hosh hian kam
chura le mujhko yun madhdham madhdham

tujh bin bata main kaise jiyunga
fate ise dil ko kaise siyunga
aanchal kahaan wo, jab aankh hogi nam
yun hi beetenge hum, bas madhdham madhdham!!

"What is LOVE??? "

2008-11-18T02:52:00.000-08:00

is it a feeling
or a self-killing??
a river of emotions
or just fake devotions??

a sweet we never knew
or a rotten bread to chew??
you steps into it
or a tide pulling bit by bit???

is it a freedom
or a purgatory kingdom???
it takes away your tension
or give the same as pension???

is it june in december
or a puzzle to decipher??
an eagle or a dove
can you tell me "what is love"???

untitled....

2008-11-16T23:29:00.000-08:00

may sound as random thoughts... :)

cheering,whistiling,
kicking the cane
rose in hand,
entered your lane
little bit nervous
happynes all around
thumping hurt,singinng birds
and shaking ground...

in front of your door
i stopped..
to check if my shirt is tucked
and hair??? dont want to be ducked

knocking on the door
i curse the dusty floor
rehearsing again all those lines
a wave of surge running in spine

when you came out
i was about to shout
oh my godess!!!
you are looking so beautiful
I will be a fool
if i think.i am cool!!

in that black gown
seemed that a fairy came down
pearls twinkling around your neck
a moment. cant be baught by any check

i lost my words, lines i prepared
uttering words, which i could have spared
i found myself, lost in sea..
but you helped me to be only "ME".

I love you...

2008-11-13T03:29:00.001-08:00

under the shower
lacking all the power
memories gripping me again
consciousness, hard to regain

smashing my head against the wall
oouch!!! it hurts, and i fall
pulling my hairs,nailing ma flash
this is wat happens, when emotions clash

i can see you here
with knife and spear
hit me, kill me, i wanna die
coz i am not one, who uttered lie(s)

you laughing haan??laugh out loud
like the thunder, peeping from cloud(s)
if this makes you happy, i'll die
with frozen blood, broken eyes, i'll cry!!!

u wanna dance...please baby dance
the floor is red.. take a glance
its my blood.. how does it matter???
yeah you can.. if you wanna flatter

but do me a favour.. a last one
i may be noone.. a last to none
walk along the past...steps very few
my words echoes there.. says.."i love you"!!!

Chamkeela....

2008-11-12T00:13:00.000-08:00

bahano aur bhaiyon
bhaiyon aur unki lugaiyon
dekho, dekho sapanon ka sansaar
neele,peele chamkeele hazaar

kahaani ka nayak ik chamkeela
ik dum stud, fir bhi akela
lakhon kudiyaan usane dekhi
har tave par roti seki
par koi na usake haath hain aayee
dil ke kamre main na roshani chaayee

par kal kismat usaki palat
haath ki lakeeren hui galat
sapane wali zameen pe aayee
chamkeele ke dil main chamkeeli chayee

lawn main chalte usako dekha
dekhkar apani aankhon ko seka
lal sweater wali dil le gayee
aur badle main gam-e-dil de gayee

par chamkeele ki kisamti chamak aayee
fair n handsome ki mehnat rang layee
jab ladkee aake thi yun muskaayee
mit gayee saari chamkeele ki tanhaayee

CONTINUED......

Aaj uthegi megha rani..!!!

2008-11-11T20:30:00.000-08:00

gandhiji ne kaha tha

jurm sahana paap hain

ghor anarth,dushkarm

manavata par abhishaap hain!!!

par kuch log

aise hi rahate hian

jurm sahte hian par

kuch na kahte hain !!!

jhaadu pocha kapde paani

ab yahi hain usaki kahani

ladki ek badi sayaani

yahaan naukar, ghar ki raani!!!

patli dubli si

lagti hain straight rekha

kya aapne kabhi

aisi ladki ko dekha???

bas bahut ho gaya

ab nikaal bhay ka ansh

ho jaane de aaj to

gar hota hain vidhwansh!!!

mana ki ladki tu

bholi bhaali hain

par bata de

tujh main bhi ek maa kaali hain!!!

mana dushman bada balwaan hain

par bhool na , tu bhi pahalwaan hain

yeh hi aaj waqt ka aahwaan hain

bhool mat , manushya tu bada mahaan hain!!!

maana dushman ke paas talwaar hain

aur roz hota tujh par waar prahaar hain

utha trishul aur hone de yuddh prachand

aaj to kar de tu dushman ko khand - khand!!!!

ab na ban ke rah gudiya sayani

utha shastra,poch aankhon se paani

ab to khatam kar tu yeh kahani ..

aaj uthegi megha rani ....!!!

HINDI......

2008-11-11T00:24:00.000-08:00

60 yrs of independence.. but we ever got mentally free. .if we look at the situation .. whether it was pre independence or post independence period.. our priorities,our way of living have always revolved around foreign culture.. in first 30 yrs..around brtish and now around american culture!!!

English ( a language which is not even 10% sofphisticated as sanskrit or hindi ).. reigning over the minds of so called YO people. this surely underlines indifferent condition of our independence too .. you can easily find ppl .. who will talk in english .. even if it is not required.. ( c'mmon yaar .. it marks our intelligence..isn't it??? ) ... ppl saying... "are yaar meri to hindi ho gayee"( by this they mean .. they felt ashamed of sthing) .. y to search with a torch in hand...just switch on TV and listen to your fav .. actors/ actresses from HINDI CINEMA ( oops.. sry i shld have said "BOLLYWOOD" ).. they will answer in ENGLISH only , does not matter in which language they have been questioned...

you must be wondering why this blog has been written in english ??? isn't it??the answer is simple .. this is for persons.. who cant think in hindi ... ( or they dont like to , or feel ashamed of doing so)so if u want to make them introspect ... english is the obvious choice.. isn't it... ???

( For those who interpret it as .. me against progress... its not like that .. c'mmon.. learning and knowing about some other culture and language is OK ... but what if we forget ours???? )
A LOT TO COME ON THIS TOPIC >>>>>> STAY TUNED!!!!

random lines...

2008-11-10T02:17:00.000-08:00

not a complete poem .. some random lines...
.
saanso ki lahar main
apane dil ke shahar main
umang ki nahar main
aaj to humein nahana hain
shaayd .. yeh bhi ek bahana hain
zindagi ki lau par
aaj khud ko aajmana hain !!!

dil main ajab si masti hain
sabse alag apani hasti hain
kshitij ke paar aaj jaana hain
yeh mausam jaana pahchaan hain

panchiyon ke paron sa
fadfadata yeh pagal man
kshan main shyam , aur fir ujjwal
yeh mera, mera vichlit man

life ...

2008-11-10T02:14:00.000-08:00

was just sitting in office.. wrote these lines...
ek gori chitthi ladki ho
aur jeb main na jab kadki ho
tab hi to yeh life life hain
jab saath main hassen wife hain

ek chamchamati car ho
aur gale main apne haar ho
jab saare sapne saakar ho
bas yahi life ka aakar ho

duniya main saari hum ghoome
aur duniya kadamon ko choome
masti main hum apani jhoome
mast kalander jaise bandar zoo main

par.. yah sab sapne hote hain
aate hain .. jab hum sote hain
na jaane, isamein hum kyun khote hain
asali zindagi main to hum bas rote hain ....

Crammed with THOUGHTS..... Once again.....

2008-10-10T01:49:00.000-07:00

With management exams around the corner, already missed the CAT form, JMET form bought but haven't dispatched yet,**************************************************,and some trifles like PASSPORT, PAN card and above all indifferent physical conditions, diminishing my struggle of having a smiling face .....

With A lot other things banging in mind.......

Feeling like....

Crammed with thoughts...... Once again......

and ................... http://techblueprints.blogspot.com/2007/04/crammed-with-thoughts.html

कश!! अगर हुम बच्चे होते!!!

2008-10-08T03:38:00.000-07:00

दुनिया भर के दुखोन से अन्जान,
न कोइ झन्झत, न होते परेशन,
रात जगते , दिन को सोते,
कश!! अगर हुम बच्चे होते!!!

चोक्लेत खाते , कभी खाते शक्कर,
ना frustration न gf क चक्कर,
मनाते सब, जब हुम झूथ मूथ के रोते,
कश!! अगर हुम बच्चे होते!!!

घूमते जैसे कोइ जोगि फक्कर,
अपनि मस्ति मैन लाल बुझक्कर,
रात दिन सपनो मैन खोते,
कश!! अगर हुम बच्चे होते!!!

अपने कदमोन मैन दुनिय होति,
क्य सोना और क्य हीरे मोति,
सुनहरि नदी मैन लगते गोते,
कश!! अगर हुम बच्चे होते!!!

DRONA----> REVIEW

2008-10-02T22:20:00.000-07:00

"TRAHI TRAHI" screaming each and every kona
Dont ask us wats happening in DRONA
A long awaited movie of my fav. actor
He doesn't know, how to protect the nectar
In between the movie enters psycho actor
He is the Villian, and one of the boring factor
Story written, by a defective plotter
A stale blend of spy kids and harry potter
Dialogues act like dark scars
Actress appears in different shiny cars
But "BABUJI"'s verses still goes on
Would have been better if had seen ROCK ON
Villain, a magician, leaves no trail
But transports a horse in a bloody RAIL
Muzic is a make up hides the marks
Arrogant director, doesn't care about remarks
In whole movie, costume is hero
Tell you what, ABHI is total ZERO
dekho bhailogon, MOvie dekh ke na rona
Rota to hain bas "FRUSTOO DRONA"
O my buddies!! movie doesn't have any sense
Lilac petals, hold the true essance
200 Rs. went in vain
Movie with GF can reduce a bit pain
To watch the movie, You have to be a fighter
Its even difficult if you are any writer.....

kya isako hi tum kahte pyaar???

2008-09-29T01:57:00.000-07:00

yahaan wahaan
jahaan tahaan
sunta hun bas
pyaar hi pyaar

pyaar hain jeevan
pyaar hain tan-man
pyaar hain darpan
pyaar hian arpan
pyaar hain sona
pyaar hain moti
pyaar bina
duniya na hoti

par main yah sab kuch
nahin janta
pyaar hian jeevan
nahin manta
kaun karta hain
pyaar ki baat??
sabke man main
bas aaye raat

rati ki baatein
bas mati main aaye
yeh angle hi sabko bhaye
jab sooraj dhalne ko aata hain
sannata sa cha jata hain
dekho ab har ghar ki baat
bhool chuke wo kasmein saat
jab kshudha shaant ho jaati hain
baichaini si cha jati hain
jab apani laaj -sharm kho kar
do laashein yun mil jaati hain
ise niyam par hi chalata sansaar..
kya isako hi tum kahte pyaar????

pyaar ajar hain
pyaar amar hain
in sabko main
nahin janta
roodhi vaadi bol vachan
ka maan-marm nahin manta
pyaar honth hian
pyaar kamar hain
kaam leela ka
yah ik samar hain
jab do premi ik dooje se
band kamre main milte hain
kab se murjhe hue sapne
bas use din ko hi khilte hain
usake baad milana dushwaar
kya isako tum kahte pyaar????

Chora 'n' Chori

2008-09-28T21:35:00.001-07:00

Hey listen!!!!
All you dude 'n' dudettes
Mute down all your gadgets
Lets hear a story
(of a ) Desi Chora 'n' a Chori.......

Chori, very vary naughty
Chora college ka tha haughty
Donon the ik duje ke friend
Very different from the trend....

Chori, Chore per thi marti
Usaka sara kaam thi karti
Chora ise baat se anjaan
Tha wo Chori ka bhagwaan....

Donon ik duje se ladte
Aur fir baat kabhi na karte
Mushkil tha door door rahana
Rona, aur kuch bhi na kahana....

Use raat subah jab hoti
Chori, kandhe par usake roti
Chora bhi tired of that game
Halat thi usaki bhi same same.....

Par ik din aisa bhi aaaya
Chora, Chori par garmaaya
Chora bola "kabhi na ladunga"
Tujhse baat kabhi na karunga....

Chori ka dil aisa tha toota
Ik tha saath wo bhi choota
Usaka pyaar tha usase rootha
Usaka chaand aaj tha toota......

Chori phoot-phoot kar royee
jaise kismat usane khoyee
Chori, Chore se fir boli
Dil ki baatein usane kholi....

Tujhse pyaar kitana main karti
Tujhpar hi hun main marti
Aaj karti hum main iqrar
Zinda rakh ya mujhko maar.....

Chore ne Chori ko dekho
Khinch aayee ansu ki rekha
Tujh bin main bhi hun akela
Nasamajh main bhi hun albela.....

I am writing "JAB THEY MET"
Chora "TIGER" 'n' Chori "CAT"
Happily lived Chora 'n' Chori
Perfect end of the story!!!!!

bas ek shaks

2008-09-25T04:31:00.000-07:00

kuch kasmen
kuch vaade
thodi hansi
thode irade

tez dhadkan
dheemi saans
mahaki umang
aur ek aas

khushaboo
pahle pyaar ki
kasak
tere intezar ki

mera jahan
tera aanchal
teri hansi
udata baadal

usaka naam
mera aks
sara jeevan
bas ek shaks.....

Armaanon ki arthi

2008-08-04T01:21:00.000-07:00

ek din hum baithe the apane ghar par
tabhi koi aaya with dupatat sar par
wo boli ki "mammi ghar par hian?"
maine kaha.."aap uchit samay par hain"

aagantuk ne humein gaur se dekha
humne socha"kabhi ladaka nahin dekha?"
khair, auraton ki baaton main kaun sar lagata
bahar baarish thi, hum nikal pade lekar apana chata

ghar par jab hum aaye
to dheere se pitajee muskaye
khaini khate hue wo lage bolane
apane armaanon ke raaj kholane

bole, beta! college bandh ho chuka hian
aajeevika ka prabandh ho chuka hain
ab har koi yahi kahata hain
bina bahu ke aangan suna lagata hain

abhi mrs tiwari aayee thi
tumhare liye apni beti ka rishta layee thi
ladki padhi likhi hian, tum kya kahte ho?
ise umar main sharmaye se kyun rajhate ho?

main mook darshak ban baatein sunata raha
apane armaanon ke sapne bunata raha
par shishtachaar ke naate maine kaha
" itani kya jaldi hain ", aur chup raha

chuppi ko "haan " samjha jata tha
chuppi ka yahi matlab humko aata tha..
par shayad use din "shabdkosh" badal gaya
niraas hua wo jo armaan machal gaya

do sal ho chuke, aaj dost ki shaadi hian
khush the hum, humein to aajadi hain
dulhan ati sunder, dil jale sabke
hamare bhi shaadi ke armaan kuch aise chahke

par abhi asali jhatke ki baari thi
dulhan ki maan , mrs tiwari thi
kaash use din wo chuppi na hoti..
to aaj yeh sunder bivi meri hoti!!!

She was a bitch!!!

2008-06-29T08:18:00.000-07:00

walking on the wet grass
eyes fixed on gal's ass
knowing that all are knowing
who cared when gal was showing

one boy told to other
she seems to be calling me
other stared, smiled and said
why you came from we to me ?

then he thought for a while
stared the beauty so fragile
then he said "wat if she's not calling? "
may be your heart is the only one falling

the first one smiled
emotions now being verbalized
for this girl, i will die
remember shakira "hips dont lie"

the boy approached the girl
love, lust going to unfurl
some moments and deal was done
a change occurred and lust was gone

now the birds seemed so keen
at CCD,McDy, they can be seen
but the wheel was moving so fast
some kisses, some hugs and sex at last

one day he saw her,kissing a so called friend
caressing bodies,was termed as trend
A ruthless smile,A sign to ditch
now he knew.. she was a bitch !!!

mingling souls :)

2008-06-27T09:58:00.000-07:00

smell of the moist sand
musical air, magical land
sweaty body smelled so pure
love and lust,without any cure
moonlight dancing on rhythmic raves
dangerous sea, angry waves
lines crossed, no turning back
senses, we decided to lack
kisses were raining
dampening, and passion gaining
we sunk in the bed of sand
mischievous yet unstoppable hand
bit by bit, cloth by cloth
crossing the lines of love and loath
painful smile, moments of passion
mingling souls,and ma confession!!!

Ek Tees ..

2008-06-27T09:56:00.000-07:00

charon taraf pada hain akaal dekho
desh main aaya hain bhoochal dekho
dekho khel rajneeti ka
kurshi main chupi aneeti ka
khel desh ki avnati ka...

par janata ko kabhi samajh naihn aata hain
unko to safed kurte wala neta bhata hian
jo keval vote ke samay shakal dikhalata hian
fir laut ke kabhi na wo aata hian

aarakshan ki aag desh ko kha rahi hian
mehanatkash bacchon ko zinda jala rahi hian
in satta lolup logon ne eemaan bech khaya hian
tabhi inko afzal guru pe taras aaya hain

mahangai ki kya baat karein
yahaan to jeena bhi dushwaar hain
rojgaar guarantee yojana ki baat karte hain
90 rs/day main kisake pet bharte hian?

bahut ho gaya ab saha nahin jata
ghut ghut kar ab yahaa nain raha jata
bharat hamari mata hian, yah kahate aaye hain
par ab nahin rah sakte, jahaan in netaon ke shaaye hain...

janani janma bhoomi swargadapi gariyashi!!!!

2008-06-21T11:46:00.000-07:00

Ek patthar se duje ne poocha..
ae bandhu kidhar ko chale tum...
to duje ne muskura kar kaha...
aaj tak maine ise gam ko saha..
ab ise bandhan ko todane ki maine bhi thani hain..
naye bharat ki nayee baat maine bhi maani hain..
main bhi to dekhun dusare desh ka sooraj kitana chamkata hain..
jisako dekhane ke liye yahaan ka aadami itana tadapata hain...
to duje patthar ne tapak se kaha...
are bandhu tum bhi aisa karoge...
to ek din sharm se maroge....
are bhed chaal to sab chalate hain...
chand sikkon ke liye to sab machalate hain..
are apane desh main roti ki kahaan kami hain...
par aazadi ke itane dinon baad bhi ....
bharat maata ki aankh main aaj bhi nami hian..
jisake charanon main hind vandan karata hain..
usaka hridaya aaj bhi krandan karata hain..
ruk jaa isase pahale ki bahut der ho jaye..
accha hoga agar subah ka bhoola saanjh se pahale hi aa jaye..

Code of Life...

2008-06-21T10:41:00.000-07:00

i tried
tried really hard
played all my cards
but still
i failed
then again i tried
tried to stop the tears
on the ruins of all the years
on the corner of my roof
i sat, totally alone!!!

i tried
to look away
from contrition of heart
vision hazed
due to tears in my eye
due to blazed sun in the sky

i tried
observed with squinted eyes
some dried out trees
deserted road
house of a widow
abandoned and lonesome
a laborer walking
sweaty but without any sum

i tried
to decipher
the code of life
and thought
there is only pain
every moment is in vain

then i saw
a little boy
on distant roof
playing with his kite
he played, got tired
his kite never took off
yet he was smiling
i found him mocking
mocking at me
a smile danced on my face
a lesson, life is a race
play your part, don't be late
rest is rest, called as fate!!!

I Remember!!!

2008-06-20T23:08:00.000-07:00

I remember
those dusty lanes
kites n those paper planes
that pencil, which left
every wall autographed by me
those corners
where i used to hide
over the mistakes
which showered some chide

i remember
that school
pretty strict yet so cool
those prayers
where i used to sleep
the time in class
boring and steep
the ringing bell
and freedom from hell

i remember
the nights of exam
the only time
when i used to read
all the time parents snarled
who cared and no heed

i remember
when i fell in love
the classes
when i thought about you
all the hours
which melted like ice
coffee table in the corner
those ice creams and fried rice

i remember
the erased memory
when my love cheated
those tears,long nights
bewitched how much i was
irritation induced useless fights

i remember
the most
the moments when
i was WRONG
the mistakes on which i still wonder
a lesson to learn from every blunder
bit by bit life goes on
leaving behind a treasure
to count on, to remember!!!

Modern TV

2008-06-20T03:53:00.000-07:00

was getting bored, wrote some lines...

aaj kal tv channels ki haalat par taras aata hain
jaise sab par ek hi baadal baras aata hian
badi hi hasarat se cable ka taar lagaya tha
alag alag program dekhane ka man banaya tha
par jab bhi maine remote ko uthaya hain
sabhi channels ko ek sa hi paya hian
news channels ko arushi bahut bhati hain
aur kuch ko mudrasfiti( inflation rate) bahut satati hain
gaane wale channels par ek se gaane aate ain
baaki saas bahu ko ek hi dhun par nachate hain

kya kabhi hamein dhang ka manoranjan mil payega?
beta - baap ke saath baith tv dekh payega?
kabhi lagata hian doordarshan ka zamana hi accha tha
manoranjan ka har rang tab kitana saccha tha
kya surabhi, rangoli ka zamana wapis aa payega?
shayad kabhi bhoole bhatake hum ise mayajaal se mukti paayen
fir gunjegi galiyaan jab bacche galiyon main nikal aayen..

My Notebook

2008-06-19T02:34:00.000-07:00

My Notebook!!!

on the corner of my table
dust covering its facade
lies a silent explorer of me

A true friend of mine
reflecting every bit of life
love, loath, ambitions
scattered on every page

it marks the day
when i won my first match
it speaks about the day
when i cried on a dropped catch

it rejoice the day
when i entered the college
the days of ragging
the days of friendship n fun
the fights which lasted in none

volumes of poems
which i wrote for her
hundreads of codes
which only lovers can decipher

it reminds me my responsibility
fathers expectations from my ability
it reminds the words which mother said
some tears which never rolled, but she had

taking the notebook
i decided to write
its not just a poem
its a salute to my guide ( my notebook!!!)

That Moment

2008-06-19T02:32:00.000-07:00

i liked it
when you chased me
down the sore of sea

when your eyes said it all
which i always liked to see

when you held me in gentle palms
creating magic of infinite charms

eyes deepening inside the soul
breaths striking magical chord

a feeling, unimaginable, deep inside
raining eyes can not hide

touch of lips, too tender too cold
i loved that moment and want to hold!!!

frastoo uvaach....

2008-05-10T13:45:00.000-07:00

time pass kavita... ( yaar jab net itana fluctuate kare tab ..to write poems is a better time pass )

yaar kya bataun, kya haal ho gaya hian

purana hun main, baaki sab kuch naya hain

aajkal to koi ek adad msg bhi nahin karta hain

na hi koi apani scrapbook bharata hain

ladkiyon ki profile dekh dekh thak gaya hun

ladkon se baat kar main pak gaya hun

engineering bhi ab poori hone ko aaye hain

khushnaseeb hain dost, kal usaki sagai hian

gali ke bacche ab uncle kah kar bulate hain

jawani ke dinon ko dimag se bhulate hain

pollution ki aag main chahre mar gaye hian

kya bataun ab to baal bhi jhad gaye hain

doston ab to bas ek aas, tamanna baaki hian

charon taraf akelapan, andhera yahan saaki hian

pandit ke chakkar lagate lagate chappal ghis gayi hain

zimmedari ke paaton main zindagi pis gayee hain

ab to jaldi se bas kanya dhundh, shaadi karwao

chahe kaho ise barbadi, to barbaadi karwao..

duniya ke chakkar main ghoom lattoo ho gaye hain

chaar saal main to poore frastoo ho gaye hain

chehare....

2008-05-09T09:12:00.000-07:00

kuch aur panktiyaan ...
**********************************
chehara.. ek chehara ..anek chehare..
un cheharon par lage hain kai pahre..
dikhane main bahut lubhavane..
bhole bhale , bahut sayane..chikane chahre,chupre chahre..
bheege se , rupahale chehare..
ek chehare ke hain dus chehare..
kritrim saundarya main lipate chehare..
kahane ko to hain jitane log..
utane nazar aayenge chehare..
nazar utha kar dekh yeh chehare..
utha yeh parde, tod yeh pahare..
aankh se man ki dekh musafir ..
nazar tujhe bas aayege do chehare..
ek chehara jo kroor hian ..
satta ke mad main magroor hain..
wo chehara bahar se bahut accha hain
man se magar shaitan ka baccha hian..
wo chehara un logon ka hain ..
jinmein kapat hain , chal hain aur bas dhokha hain..

doosara chehara sakuchata hain ...
apane haq par bhi sharmata hian ..
wo chehara maan ki duaon ka hain..
wo chehara pita ki aashon ka hain..wo chehara bhole sapanon ka hain..
wo chehara , pawan hain , pavitra hain aur mangal hain..
ghabarata usase sara yah jangal hain ..

ise jangal main aaj gajab dangal chaya hian ..
kapati chehara aaj fir se mandara aaya hain
kapati chehara aarakshan(reservation) lata hain..
bhai bhai ko ladvata hain ...
desh main godhara karwata hain..

par humko hum hi rahana hain ..
jhoothe vaadon main na bahana hain..
hum apana kaam karte jayenge..bharat ko aage le jayenge...
manavata aur smradhi ka parcham hum lahrayenge..
ek acche chehare ko..man se sacche chehare ko..apana chehara banayenge..!!!
Dilip Sanchora 9/5/2008
*******************************************

Some lines..

2008-05-08T23:46:00.000-07:00

i like to play with words???.. yes i do.. ek dum jhakkas time pass...

Vestiges of my beloved dreams

Scary how much, when they screams

They speak every word, which I fear...

Shattered soul is going to tear…

So much scared, holding my heart tight…

Don’t wanna loose , just want to fight…

Why am I suffering ,for my heart’s deed..

I want to be free, gonna break this creed…

I think, I bought adulterated love…

Innocence was fake, in the form of a dove..

I am not gonna endure this pain…

Won’t let go the time in vain…

I wanna throw this garbage away from my mind…

Left it loose, but it’s time to wind...

Now fear seems to be dripping away from heart…

Do whatever u want, I m not gonna hurt…

sapanon ki chubhan!!!

2007-08-12T09:04:00.000-07:00

once again "Crammed with thoughts"
wrote some line ..incomplete ...but will complete these ...some day......

bachapan main jab kabhi indradhanush dekha to
yun laga ki koi chamatkaar ho gaya...
rangon ne jo dekha sapana, saakar ho gaya...
sapanon ki raah to hamane bhi pakadi kabhi..
lagan ki bediyaan is dil ne jakadi kabhi...
lekin wo chaah ab ghutan lagane lagi hain..
sapanon ki anjuman ab chubhan lagane lagi hian...
lekin yeh chubhan pathik ke paon ke chaale hian..
isi chubhan se hi to yeh din-raat niraale hain...
yeh chubhan hi to ukhadi saanso main naya josh deti hain...
in ulajhi rahon par chalane ka hosh deti hian....
ek din manzil ko pana hian...yeh baat hamne man se kahi hain..
shayad isi liye to yeh kaali ratien in jaagati aankhon ne sahi hain...

To Be Continued.........

I wish....

2007-06-29T11:51:00.000-07:00

The Insomniac...huh....its 12:30 am and like always i m still wide awake..tried to read something but all in vain ..ya watched "catch me if u can"...was a gud movie!!!.are haan....atlast INDIAN CRICKET TEAM won (against a good team like S.A.) ...kudos to them ....with an attractive contribution from MASTER BLASTER SACHIN!!!....
For last few days i was thinking of starting "atlas shrugged " of "ayan rand" but i think its not rite time to do so...have a lots of stuff to complete and I am running out of time (i know time is not the excuse of anything but again i m a human being!!!)...
when i stroll down the memory lane ...i can still remember the nights of exams in my childhood and till september of last year ...i was never able to be awake after 11 pm (chahe preparation kitani bhi baaki kyun na ho)...but after september of last year some changes took place ..and trully speaking some significant changes took place...if i take the average of ma sleeping hours those will come out to be 3-4 hrs...(may be its not that much less ...but for a boy like me who used to sleep 8-9 hrs a day ..it is a significant change)
Now i am really exhausted by the catnaps (only catnaps!!!!)......i wish if someone comes and sings soporific lullby for me..................I WISH....................!!!!

Frozen Tears...

2007-06-25T11:34:00.001-07:00

I was goin through some community at orkut and found this one ...someone wrote a poem and left it there to complete ...so i tried...(the words in red, are written by me... :) )

I was afraid one day you will be gone
I would be left crying and weeping

Whom would I say that you are cute
To whom whould I call innocent and pure

I screamed I begged to stop you
For no one to listen to the unheard voices within

Now tears are at the brink of my eyes
As you leave waving hands to say byes

But I wont let them fall right now
I have freezed them on my eyebrows

They would fall only when you come back
To celebrate the rejoice of being with you

I will wait forever to set them free
with faith in my love and in God

but wat if ..we never meet again
wat if there is no soul to regain

i'll have to accept that u r gone
leavin me blue and quite alone

i think baby..u took me for granted
i think i m behavin like besotted

the coda of my love is being written
page i m writing is damped for certain

my eyes are moist and vision is hazed
but i can see my future being shaped

the world around me is rapidly belting
so do I..and frozen tears are melting!!!

khushaboo .....

2007-06-08T10:53:00.000-07:00

I was just sittin in front of my compu...and i dont know wat struck me and i wrote some lines....and here it goes...

In fizaon main mahakane ki
chahat to khusaboo ko hoti hain
magar hawaon ke paron par baithe bina
yeh khwahish poori kahhan hoti hian...

aasman ke kaalin par khelati
ae pawan mujhako bhi apane saath le chal
mahaka dun raston ko tere
ise ghata ki tarah pakad ke haath le chal

in mahakate raston se kabhi to koi gujarega
tujhe rok kar tujhse mera pata poochega
par tu usase bas itana hi kahana...
swarth ka daaman chod ek khusboo mahek gayee
jaise sawan main kisi daal par koyal chahak gayee
apane kan kan ko woh in vadiyon main bicha gayee
chod ke tan apana apani manzil ko paa gayee!!!!

Its Raining...Once Again...

2007-06-08T08:15:00.000-07:00

Onec again ...Its Raining....every moment which passes, has its own significance in life,some memories associated with it...and these pearls pourin today..also have some memories to cherish on!!!!

I fear if u can feel the same way as a boy from western Rajasthan feels, when it Rains....Its five yrs now when i m missing each and every season at home..no HOLI,no DIWALI ..not even RAKSHA BANDHAN (sawan man bhawan aayo, bahana man main harkhayee..rakhee ri poonam ayee...rakhi ri poonam ayee)...But again its life... :)
Now coming back to Rain....when i was at home...i always waited for rain..i dont know why.. but it always made me feel good(wat abt PAKODAs and GARMAGARAM CHAI .. :) )....
But at Raurkela......where it rains alot....i never had a chance to enjoy Rain....none of my frnds here likes to enjoy my way....their all time fav. job...SLEEPING!!!..GOD!!! i hate this.....One thing which i'll have to admit is that..ya its tough to admit but its the way I feel....I got good friends here ....but good company?????,,,,,A big NO!!!!!...but i think..shayad apani hi koi galati hogi... :)
Now as it is raining...it reminds me of something way back in 2002..in jodhpur....
It was Raining and we all ...me(LEE), ravi(P.DAS), mayank(CHI), swapnil,jitesh,sushil,ramesh bhaiya (as am not able to recall who were there at that time so i m writing all names)...we all were enjoying rain on the roof...Suddenly one of us, came up with an idea ..."what if we make PAKODAs"....waise none of us knew how to make that stuff but ...we all were too enthusiastic to stop.....As me and swapnil knew nothing ...we went to buy all the raw stuff like..besan(i dont know ..wat the hell do you call it in english.. :)),potatos, onions etc,.....
Then it started...most probably P.Das (ravi)..decide to make the stuff...and then mother of all battle began.... :)....sometimes there was more water and less besan and the mixture was too dilute and sometimes just opposite....this all went on untill the whole besan was exhausted and we reached to the conlusion that, "ya this is the perfect mixture..'....we had no choice either..:)
And after all the "MATHAPACCHI ( cumbersome process)" ..we had our PAKODAs ready and it was awsome...really.....and that make that rain special for us...aakhir kabhi to khud se bana kar kuch khaya.... :)
And today, when it is raining i m missing that RAIN...those PAKODAs....that ENTHU.....and above all I M MISSING ALL OF U GUYS .....WE ALL ROCKED TOGETHER......DIL SE!!!!!

Que Sera Sera

2007-06-06T10:36:00.000-07:00

“Could fulfillment ever be felt as deeply as loss?”

Have you ever thought on this....what you remember the most...ur success or your failure.....will you ever be able to suceed if you have never come across failure.....if u find everythin easily in life ....then there will be a certain vaccumm in life.....so over the years wat i have discovered is to chase the dreams in a steady manner...never try to extream...but never let ur dreams go without a chase... i think...there should be a sort of perfection...for me "perfection is the best effort within the constraints of space, time and resources".... There was a time when i tried extream hard in chasing my dreams without any perfection...and that failure still haunts me.... whenever i found my self in a situation ..where i am depressed or not able to find my way out.....whenever i find mysef gloomy and shaken up...following poem by Rudyard Kipling, inspires me to move on....

if you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you
But make allowance for their doubting too,
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream–and not make dreams your master,
If you can think–and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build ‘em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: “Hold on!”

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings–nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much,
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
And–which is more–you’ll be a Man, my son!

A reminder...

2007-06-06T07:52:00.000-07:00

Can you tell that how many types of ppl r there in this world?????.....ya ..if it had been "bunty and bubbly"..the answer would have been "two"...but its not a show on silver screen ...its goddamn life!!!!.....beyond our glazed dreams..there is a world in which ppl really "LIVE".....struggle to live...and you know ...when you come across these type of ppls ....you really feel pity,a sense of guilt....but as you go beyond tht ....all your senses, all your feelings ..vanishes in a second..and that's the human nature....

let me share one of my straight encounter with the shit called as life......it was when i was coming to bck to ma coll ...it was the journey from ahemdabad to raurkela....as i boarded in the train....due to some railway exam or for the other reasons ..there was an enormous rush...double of the ppl than who were sitting,were standing....i went straight to ma seat and slept ...after some time i felt some one sitting near ma legs....i dont know why ..but it was more uncomfortable mentally than physically...contrary to ma nature i yelled at him...."kya bhaiya oopar baithoge kya"...he said politely..."are bhaiya jagah nahin hain..aur kuch problem hain"...but i said churlishly.."to maine kya theka le rakha hain..."...and he stood up and went away....when i woke up ....and wat i saw ..left me cursing my self....the man whom i drove away ..was sitting unconfortably near the washbasin......he was having artificial leg instead of the natural one........i was really ashamed of maself....i thought..even if he hadn't had that artificial leg...i shouldn't have behaved with him like that...for once i thought tht i shld call him and shld give gim some space to sit....but i dont know wat restrained me and i didn't...after sometime it was his station and he disappeared....and for sometime i was just rapt in thoughts "why didn't i call him up??? it striked me but i didn't impliment it" and it was pinching me inside...i finished thinking with resolution that "frm now onwards i'll implement the things as soon as it strikes me.."..

And earnestly speaking ..in our life...we need impregnable determination of our character to make decisions and ya to implement it too..whether it is related to your career or it is an emotional one....coz...time is something which never waver waits for anyone...

But the same natural thing happened to me once again ...and i forgot the incident in seconds....and my resolution as well.....it was when i read something like this somewhere ..and all of sudden the whole thing just ...stood in front of me once again...i decided to write this blog to remind me that ...at that day watever said to maself was not gibberish/ rambling ...it was a promise to which i have to live up for rest of my life!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friends

2007-04-11T09:45:00.000-07:00

Suppose you have got everything ..everything ..which you can expect ..to have in this world ...but not a friend..then what will be the situation ...can you imagine????.....yes you can say that ...you do..but deep down ..inside your heart..if you dont feel a storm raisin ...then you certainly dont understand!!!!Coz i believe that you dont know what you have got untill you say "gudbye"....A friend is someone ....whom you can say everything ..everything...each and every bit of your heart....even your most abominable crime..!!!!

but to what extent you can bother your friend....i believe this is sthing which is called as'uncountabble..or undefined".....your friend will listen to u...will try to heal you...will correct you...and thts the way a friend should be!!!!

Last night i had a vigourous discussion with one of my best friend.....something which i never had..i hurt her alot ...it seemed that she was annoying me with every single word....and when it was my turn ..she was like..."i have to go"....i was furious ...furious like hell..and lot more helpless than that...

But in the morning when i woke up...i dont know wat had happened to me ..but it seemed refreshing...i found scorching sun as a source of motivation rather than a source of immense heat....

I tried to find the source of this metamorphism.....and all i get was "time" ..yes..Time...sometime we need Time to think..Time to rectify our mistakes...and thats what my FRIEND gave me..rather than indulging me in an aimless discussion...rather than making me dependent..she forced me to think.......................this is all i want to say...for a friend ..a true friend indeed....you led me to REINCARNATION....

thank you ..thank you very much my friend...i hope u'll be always there to help me....

Crammed with Thoughts

2007-04-06T07:25:00.000-07:00

Too much ambitions.....and a small life...!!! Satisfied with little...but what if tht little is equal to everything!!!! Putting your best endeavour....but wat if, that best is not sufficient enough!!!! Looking for the answer of a simple question....but what if the answer is too complex to understand!!!! Struggling with your past .....what about the future knocking at the door!!!

Being a member of a community who always boast about the only fact that they are the best creature on the earth....simply speaking human being, all these questions may sound as a white noise!!! but someday when you wake up...and you feel so lonely and powerless...then these questions bang in your mind shell....and then just leave you "Crammed with thoughts"...

are there any solutions for these kind of situation ...when your head goes heavy and ...all your dreams just gravitates down to the earth core.....

A devine motivation is the only thing which we search for in these kind of situations..that can be found in anything....anything whichever comes in your way.....

i think this much is enough ...coz i m feeling like..
"crammed with thoughts"...